1. Forgiveness-to destroy has many forms, being a weapon of the world of form. Not all of them are obvious, and some are carefully concealed beneath what seems like charity. Yet their purpose is to separate and make what God created equal, seem different. Some forms are easy to discern.

2. In this group, first, there are the forms in which a “better” person deigns to stoop to save a “baser” one from what he truly is. (This is considered by many to be a “high calling.”) Forgiveness here rests on an attitude of gracious lordliness so far from love that arrogance would be a better term for it. This is not merciful; this is ego.

3. Another form, like the previous one, does not appear in quite such blatant arrogance. This one is where the forgiver does not claim to be better, but equal in the sin which he is forgiving, where both have been unworthy and deserve the "wrath" of God. (e.g. “I am as low or lower than you.”) Yet can you “join” in condemnation and still forgive another? Can any thought of condemnation actually induce the remembrance of God?

4. Here the goal is to separate from God the Son He loves, and keep him from His Source as unworthy. This goal is also sought by those who seek the role of martyr at another’s hand. (This may pass as meekness and as charity instead of cruelty.) This has the effect of making the forgiver appear as a saint, who bears with patience the anger and hurt another gives, without showing the pain he is experiencing. It is like saying, “see how good I am, how long-suffering I am without complaint?” Again, this is another obvious form of forgiveness-to-destroy when seen correctly.

5. Forgiveness-to-destroy will often hide behind a cloak like this. It shows the face of suffering and pain, in silent proof of guilt and of the ravages of sin. Saying, “This was done to me by you. I understand, however, that you have had a difficult journey in life, and that you do not really mean the things you say or do, that it is not you but the ego, and therefore I let you walk all over me with no demur, no stepping aside, because I understand.” (Do not let this continue. Bring it to the light of TRUE understanding.) And is this forgiveness? Is this love? Or is this martyrdom? Is it rather treachery to one who needs salvation from the pain of guilt? What could it be except to keep the witnesses of guilt away from love? Martyrdom is never of God.

6. Forgiveness-to-destroy can also take the form of bargaining and compromise. “I will forgive you if you meet my needs, for in your slavery is my release.” Say this to anyone and you are slave, because what you offer a brother is what you are offering to yourself. And you will seek to rid yourself of guilt in even further bargains which can give no hope, but only greater pain and misery. How fearful has forgiveness now become, and how distorted is the end it seeks? Slavery begets slavery, begets slavery, begets slavery. It is like a lie you tell where you have to keep on lying to protect the first lie, then tell another lie to protect the first and second lie, etc.

Have mercy on yourself who bargains thus. God gives and does not ask for recompense. There is no giving but to give like Him. All else is mockery. For who would try to strike a bargain with the Son of God, and then thank his Father for his brother's holiness? Your brother is either holy, or your next victim in bargaining. It cannot be both, just one or the other. Choose wisely when you choose, as you choose for yourself.

7. What would you show your brother? Would you try to reinforce his guilt and thus your own? Forgiveness is the means for your escape. How pitiful it is to make of it the means for further slavery and pain. Yet within the world of opposites there is A Better Way to use forgiveness for the goal of God, and find the peace He offers you. Use forgiveness to look beyond error to the truth: that both you and your brother are creations of the Father. Both you and your brother are sinless, and therefore worthy of the Kingdom. Use forgiveness any other way and you have sought your death via the ego, and prayed for separation from your Self – which includes the separation from your brother, and from the happiness of God that is already yours and your brothers! It is Christ's face forgiveness lets you see. It is His face in which you see your own.

8. All forms forgiveness takes that do not lead away from anger, condemnation, judgment and comparisons of any kind are as death. For that is what their purposes have set. Be not deceived by them, but lay them by as worthless in their tragic offerings. You do not want to stay in slavery. You do not want to be afraid all the time; nor do you want to be afraid of God. So see the holiness in everything. Ask to see everything differently. And remember, a person does not have to do everything exactly as you do to be “right”.  God will show you the way.

You want to see the sunlight and the glow of Heaven shining on the face of earth, redeemed from sin and in the Love of God. From here is prayer released, along with you. Your wings are free, and prayer will lift you up and bring you home where God would have you be. Amen